Nightwish

Since I promised in my last post to talk about the band Nightwish, here it comes. Believe it or not, Nightwish originates in Finland. Is it just me or does it seem like all the really good metal bands come from these really remote areas? Anyway... They got started up in 1996 thanks to their keyboardist, guitarist, and their former singer Tarja. Since then Tarja's been replaced by Anette Olzon. I mean, yeah, she does a good job, but there's nothing like Tarja's voice. She's currently putting out work as a solo singer so you can still enjoy it. Despite the rumors I hear that Tarja's a total bitch to work with, I want her back with Nightwish. They didn't get Anette until the release of their album Dark Passion Play, their sixth album out of seven. And they just recently released the news of their upcoming album that's going to be entitled Imaginarium. And Tarja's not the only replacement that the band has seen. Before anything happened with Anette, Sami Vänskä the bassist, was asked to leave the band and was replaced with Marco Hietala.
The band has seen so many different changes and their music has changed along with it. When Tarja left, plenty of fans decided to swear off of Nightwish forever due to their new singer. Personally I try to give the new members a chance before I write them off. I'll line up a couple samples, Nightwish with Tarja and Nightwish with Anette. Which do you like more?

Metal Meets Opera

Just because within the span of two days I have not only watched The Phantom of the Opera with Emmy Rossum and Gerard Butler (swoon) but I've also listened to my favorite version of the cover of the song "Phantom of the Opera" this post is being made. Hopefully I'll manage to get a few of you hooked on the band that sings it. Nightwish is awesome and I'll be sure to follow up this post with one about them soon-ish. But for now, enjoy a metalized of Andrew Llyod Webber's most famous composition...



And I don't want to hear any complaining of, "Oh, they ruined a masterpiece!" or any other crap like that. You will forever be labeled as an emo if you do.

How to Get a Goth Chick

For those guys who are part of the aboveground scene but may have their eye on a certain underground chick, I'm here to give some helpful hints on how to talk to that special someone.

1. Do not try and use pick-up lines. Pick-up lines are not impressive to any woman alive or dead, so leave them at the door. Goths and metalheads in particular hate overused and over-hyped things, so it stands to reason that using one is not going to serve you well at all.

2. If you aren't part of the scene, don't pretend to be. In other words guys, don't be posers. No mature goth is going to turn you away all because you might be an abovegrounder. My most recent boyfriend dressed like a gangsta and we were together for over two years. Not to mention you're probably going to wind up looking like an idiot when the girl asks what music you like and you can't think of a single metal band to save your life.

3. Don't be intimidated by her friends. Yes all the guys she hangs out with, not to mention the girls, look scary and strange but they'll be friendly too. Undergrounders like it when abovegrounders try to talk and have friendly conversations with us. We give a lot of respect to people who treat us like everyone else.

4. Do not be a player. This should go without saying for picking up any girl. But I give all you guys fair warning now. Goths and metalheads stick together and look out for each other. If you screw one of us over, you screw all of us over. If you're in it just to say you fucked a goth chick, then reconsider very, very carefully.

5. The best way to attract a goth girl in a club--DANCE. I'm not kidding. Even if you don't know how or if the music isn't your style, give it a shot anyway. There's plenty of ways to dance at goth clubs and they're all unique so no one's going to care if yours looks a bit different from everyone else. And one very important piece of advice... Goth dancing is usually a solo thing, so don't try to go and grind up on the girl. It's just going to piss her off.

Now that you're armed with all this fabulous advice, go out and get that little vampiress of your dreams.

Metal Mayhem Update!

O.K. I know that the full line-up for Mayhem has been posted for over a month now and I feel the need to apologize profusely for not putting up a blog about it earlier. Once you guys forgive me for my lapse in concentration I get to be uber excited because guess who's headlining again at Mayhem this year? Can you guess, huh? Here's a hint...



DISTURBED. Yup, that's right, Disturbed is returning to Mayhem. Awesome, right? Well guess who's accompanying them?



GODSMACK. As if Disturbed wasn't awesome enough, they're giving us Godsmack too. Then Godsmack will be followed with Megadeth, Machine Head, In Flames, and Trivium. They're all going to be headlining on the main stage and for the "Extreme Stage" we have Suicide Silence, All Shall Perish, and Straight Line Stitch. For the "Jagermeister Stage" they've got Unearth, Kingdom of Sorrow, and Red Fang.
For more updates on when tickets go on sale for your area go on down to their site and check it out.

Audition

This is going to be one of the rare modern-horror films that actually makes the cut to be on my preferred horror flick list. Always trust the Japanese to come up with something mind bending and totally horrific and bloody for audiences. And, just like any good horror flick, it starts out with someone dieing. No it's not the villain... or in this case villainess. It's just the wife of the main character and she dies a normal, hospital-stay death. Nothing outrageous. But don't let that fool you, there's plenty of gore to pass around by the end of the film. The widower waits a few years, lets his son grow up and decides that he wants to remarry. Since he feels so old and decrepit, he gets a friend to help him find the right woman. They hold a fake audition (hence the title) for him to find a classy, elegant woman. Enter an ex-ballerina, wounded and fragile to catch his attention. She seems completely normal, until you get to the scene that shows her obsessively watching her phone while sitting in the middle of an empty room minus a huge sack in the corner. Phone rings, she grins very creepily, and you hear a very, very horrifying sound from the sack and it starts rolling around. Intrigued yet? If not here's the IMDB page for the film. Oh, and by the way, the string she's holding in her hand in the picture is piano wire... I'll just let that roll around in your imaginations, he he he.

The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo

After about three different people all said that I reminded them of Lisbeth Salander, I had to watch this movie. Once I first saw The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo and Lisbeth took the scene, my first reaction was, "Oh my god! She is like me!" Based off a best-selling novel by Steig Larson, it tells the story of a Gothic young woman who helps a journalist find the missing niece of a very prestigious family. The case is cold and over 40 years old, but Lisbeth and Mikael Blomkvist are determined to find out what happened to her. Along the way Lisbeth meets with a lot of trouble from her new guardian while Mikael deals with the aftermath of a trial he just lost. And the more they discover the more dangerous it gets for both of them. The Girl With a Dragon Tattoo is the first in a series that was left unpublished when Larson died in 2004. the other two are The Girl Who Played With Fire and The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet's Nest. All three have been made into films and all three are available in book form. I still need to read all of them even though I've seen all the films. Noomi Rapace is just downright sexy too, so if you don't see it for any other reason, see it for her and the awesome back tattoo she has.

Gothic Manga: Vampire Doll

This is one comic book that pretty much anyone can enjoy even if they aren't a goth or metalhead. I stumbled across this particular one quite a few years ago when I first started to seriously read manga (Japanese comic books). Essentially the idea of the story is that the spirit this feared and ruthless vampire lord from the days of yore, Guilt-Na-Zan

is released from the confines of a crucifix it was put it thanks to the descendant of an exorcist and instead of placing the spirit back in his original body, the descendant decides to put it into this body...And as if a vampire lord trapped in the body of a very pretty female doll wasn't enough, the descendant decides to have the vampire lord do his housework and become his maid. In order to change back to his normal form and regain his powers, Guilt-Na-Zan must drink the blood of the exorcist's little sister, and if he does it without permission he's punished with wearing frilly dresses and more housework. Just the random moments that feature Guilt-Na-Zan freaking out are hilarious. And when more characters, such as Guilt-Na's loyal bat servant Vincent, get into it, chaos tends to break loose and more hilarity ensues. I recommend this to pretty much everyone and anyone who likes to read comics of any kind and who likes to laugh.