Geek Culture

It is time to once more hear the wise and all-knowing words of Foamy the Squirrel my dear readers! This time he takes to the streets once again to try and preserve one of the oldest subcultures... being a Geek. Just like being a goth or punk (or even a metalhead), geekdom has been taken over by the mainstream and made into something far more streamlined and fashion-sensitive than it was ever meant to be. While I may identify with many alternative and underground lifestyles, I will never call myself a geek. Why, you might ask? Because I am not a geek, pure and simple. I'm a nerd, but I do not have the technical, mathematical, or scientific know-how to be known  as a geek. I love Star Wars, Harry Potter, anime, and Star Trek. Just because the Big Bang Theory is a part of my regular viewing experience when I decide to make use of the cable does not make me a geek. But allow me to turn the conversation over to Foamy to fully explain the heinous crime that is being committed against true geeks everywhere.

Now I have to admit, one of the things that pisses me off the most about the wanna-be geeks is the fact that suddenly everyone and their mother is wearing those fake horn-rimmed glasses even when they don't require corrective lenses. People, you look ridiculous and sound even worse when you try to be a geek and you aren't one. Stop it...

Happy Belated Yule!

I'm only a day late, so that's excusable right?

A Long Overdue Return

I must beg forgiveness once again my little gothlings. These six long months I have not been fair at all to my readers. Things just seem to keep on piling up, but that is barely an excuse. If I ever do it again, feel free to yell at me if you so wish. For now I'll ease you lot (and myself) back into the groove of things and mention my newest ambitions to you all.

First up: I'm currently working on a Nightmare Before Christmas trio tattoo! When all is said and done Jack, Sally, and Zero will all adorn my body in a more permanent style. And I'd say it's going pretty well so far. Just this past weekend I got Sally completed. What do you think?

I'm beyond ecstatic with it. My tattoo artist from my good ol' standby Alter Ego has done an amazing job with her. Once my bank account looks a little bit healthier (which might take a little while I'll admit) I'll be well on my way to getting Jack added and then its just a hop, skip and a jump until I get Zero put on and the trio will be complete!

And before you ask... yes, that hurt like fucking hell! My artist even used some numbing agent once the outline and shading was done... it meant exactly jack shit while he was doing all that solid color in the hair. And the shading alone was enough to bring me to tears. Yes, I very nearly cried and I'm definitely not ashamed to admit it. I'm a bony little bitch to put it lightly, so getting tattooed on my ribs was murder...

As for my second ambition, I have to give a little background first in order to explain everything. My boyfriend recently succeeded in getting me hooked on a few songs by the Italobrothers, especially "Stamp on the Ground." Never heard of it you say? Well we can't have that now can we?

Pretty catchy, huh? And did you notice the guys who were doing some kind of strange two-step, jump style dance in the water? Of course you didn't... you were too busy looking at the scantily clad women jumping on the bed. For shame... Watch it again and look for the dancing men. 

You catch it this time? OK good. What they're doing is a little something called "jumpstyle." Real imaginative name right? Well "Jumpstyle" can refer to either the dance or even the type of music that is playing. The dancing is (as my boyfriend put it) basically line-dancing for ravers, and he did not lie. This, my dear readers, is what I'm going to attempt once my tattoo is a bit more healed. Looks easy you say? Take another look...

You can't seriously look at the majority of the things these guys are doing and tell me it looks easy... Not to mention the fact that I'm working against being out of shape and highly uncoordinated along with short legs. Yeah... wish me luck. I'm definitely going to need it...

What Happens When The Who's Grow Up?

Now to most of the people who were children aged anywhere from 5 to 15 will probably remember the live-action version of Dr. Seuss's How the Grinch Stole Christmas, that starred Jim Carrey as none other than the almost-loveable green Santa impostor. This was a story that warmed all our hearts around the holiday season. A story about a mean and surly... creature that hated Christmas for some reason that the book never truly explained, but that the movie made into a highly psychosis-ridden history. But when he attempts to destroy that most hated holiday, he learns through the Who's of Whoville, that Christmas does not revolve around presents as he was lead to believe. So his heart grows three sizes, he returns all the gifts he stole, blah blah blah...
From the movie edition, you'll probably remember his cute side-kick, Cindy Lou Who, the cherub-cheeked, button-nosed little sweetheart who was having her own doubts about the Christmas spirit and what the hell the holiday was even about in the first place.
I can already see your minds beginning to turn and question what the hell a children's story has to do with the alternative and underground world I'm continuously trying to prove is not all deep, dark, scary, and borderline murderous. Well...

This band is known as The Pretty Reckless. And you see that smoking hot blonde who's their lead singer/guitarist? Her name is Taylor Momsen and she is non other than...

Yup... That sweet and innocent little Who grew up to be a badass punk rocker chick. Don't believe me? Take a look at her imdb. See? All those goth and metalhead psychos you see didn't all come from shady backgrounds and broken homes. A lot of us had perfectly normal childhoods (or in her case a stardom childhood) and we wound up this way because... well... we're just badasses on the inside. But I digress, if you had taken a look at me when I was a kid, there was nothing to suggest I would've turned out a goth metalhead either. The only difference between me and the "normal" people is I found a different set of friends who took me in, no questions asked, and showed me a different way to have fun and express myself. And don't go pulling the whole "Oh you were so cute, what happened?" crap... You don't have to assume that something traumatic or horrible happened to make us this way. The chips got tossed and that's where they fell. As for Taylor, I'd say she's doing pretty damn well for herself, and I say good for her! :)

The Hobbit :The Desolation of Smaug Trailer!

At long last! We have a trailer to add to our torment of waiting for the next Hobbit movie to come out!

P.S. Legolas is back!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Pilze is an Artist (Sort Of)

Seriously, just watch this episode for the final 30 seconds...

I want to sympathize with him but I'm laughing too hard!

Metal Men are Gentlemen!

Just to continue what I've been trying to impress upon people, metalheads and most of the alternative scene are actually cool people so long as you don't act like a dick to us. If my previous post wasn't enough to convince you that we're not the psychotic loners most people make us out to be (like the media and nearly every children's movie ever), maybe this will...

Don't believe me? It's on Facebook somewhere...

Not to mention this is a perfect example of the difference between real metalheads and the wannabe jagoffs who think they're hardcore because they listen to whiny emo music...

Another Germaine Fantasy

So I have learned something interesting about Germaine today watching the new Foamy episode... she's got a kink for dwarf orgies... Huh... Anyone else want to see a movie of her playing Snow White? Although, now that I think about it, that movie wouldn't be suitable for anyone under the age of 18... and even then maybe not for anyone without strong stomachs...

Finally You Can Nerdgasm!

At long last the video I've been waiting months and months for from our favorite long-limbed violinist, Lindsey Stirling, has finally been posted! My undergrounders, I give you Lindsey Stirling performing the HALO theme! Enjoy!

Two Rants and a Chibisode

First for the most unbelievable and surprising event... -ahem-.... I have officially gone vegetarian! Yes, it is true. I have forsaken the deliciousness that is meat in exchange for a diet consisting of "rabbit" food and other tofu-ey goodness. No I'm not going vegan, because I'm pretty sure that would kill me. I'm still enjoying eggs and dairy to the fullest extent so long as those diary products don't result from a poor animal dying. Fun fact: there's an ingredient in most cheeses called rennet that's made from the stomachs of unweaned calves. And if that fact isn't disgusting enough for you, a lot of products that don't use red dye for the coloring, they use ground up cochineal beetles to give it the red coloring. I'll let those stomach churning discoveries roll around in your dark little noggins for a while...

Second off... my patience for humanity is running thin lately for one main reason. People are so fucking butthurt over the stupidest shit in the world. And that doesn't necessarily mean that those things are minor either, they can be major things to be butthurt over and for it to still be stupid for someone to be butthurt over it. Did that make sense? Either way, just today I personally witnessed someone getting butthurt over the fact that I shared a macro on Facebook about how Heinekein was supposedly supporting dog fighting. This person-who-needs-to-reevaluate-their-priorities feels it is necessary not just to tell me that the thing is probably fake but that I should essentially "do my research before passing a picture around Facebook." I'm sorry, but why in the living fuck do you care that much for a major brand of beer! I can guarantee they don't know or give a fuck who you are so long as you drink their stupidity inducing beverage... not that they need any to begin with. All this butthurt shit is getting out of hand. Even people being butthurt that their "religious rights are being violated" by this and that and the other... SHUT THE FUCK UP! NO ONE CARES! Go and whine to the cockroaches scuttling across the floor because they at least understand the shit coming out of your mouth because they probably feed on the same quality every day. End rant...

For more entertaining news... CHIBISODE!

Squirrely Advice

Attention! Foamy is now offering his infinite squirrely wisdom to the idiotic masses for only $5.00!

P.S. Please refrain from feeding the zombie squirrels. They are only to be fed by trained professionals.

Thoughts and Prayers to Those in Boston

Undoubtedly, whether through Facebook or the news, most of you have heard about the bombings in Boston today during the marathon. My heart goes out to all those who had to witness and endure such a horrible event. I pray for peace for all of you, that you may never need to go through such trying times again.

2 for 1 Reviews: A Concert and a Body Art Studio

Since I've been horribly lax in updating the blog lately (I apologize for that by the way for the few loyal readers I have), I've decided that I'll give all my little gothlings a two for one deal in this post. So today I bring you two reviews on events recently. The first was the show at Mr. Smalls featuring KMFDM...

KMFDM dates back to before I was born and they are still tearing up stages across the world. This was my first concert with them ever and it was amazing! The show opened with Pittsburgh native band Rein[forced] who got the crowd nice and riled up. Up second was Chant, who drummed out the beats to get all our blood pumping. Then Legion Within took the stage by storm with their awesome beats that everyone started head banging to a little earlier than expected. Then it was KMFDM's turn to rock our worlds and did they ever deliver! And the fun didn't stop for me when the music ended (KMFDM gave us a double encore!), when we finally ventured out into the blistering cold of the March night, the bands were out and about chilling with the fans.

This is part of the reason I love going to concerts at Mr. Smalls, because the bands don't stay completely segregated from the fans for the entire night. At the only other concert I attended at Mr. Smalls I got to meet and get pictures with none other than Wednesday 13 and The 69 Eyes! And this experience was no different. Out in the main hall where all the merch was displayed, I got to meet the wonderful William, singer for Legion Within. I'm telling you, this guy is the biggest sweetheart ever and put up with me bugging him most of the night. You need further proof? He continued to talk to me after the night was over via Facebook. Now that is a band that cares about the fans and takes time to notice them. You can't ask for more than that. Not only that, I got to chill with KMFDM's Lucia (who hugged me and poked me in the belly) and got pics from everyone I ran into. Overall, totally badass night.

And for even more local news... The (relatively) new body art studio Alter Ego...

This is a nice little place located up in Dormont and run by a buddy of mine. I was uber excited for him when he first told me about the idea back in the summer and I anxiously awaited the news of its opening since then. Well, he finally got it up and running, I promised him I would pay a visit for tattoos and piercings and I managed to keep my promise at last this past weekend. I brought in a design I've been sitting on for months to get quoted and to get a quick tat done while I was there. Maybe its just because I know the guy, but most tat and piercing parlors I go to, it always feels a little alien to me. This time, it was being welcomed into the most friendly environment I've ever come across in the body art world. There were friends sitting around and chatting, having a good time and just a very relaxed place. It's nice and open so you never feel cut off from any part of the area, and the prices are great! The tattoo artist I got introduced to not only gave me a great price on the design I had, but also managed to get my small tat done within the same hour. You can't beat that. And did I mention they have Living Dead Dolls for sale there too? Now you HAVE to go and check it out! 

A War on Celebrity Stench

For this newest Foamy episode, the great fuzzy one turns to a subject that, to be honest, I've been pondering for the past few years. Why does every celebrity need their own line of perfume or cologne? People, you are not an expert on this. Hell, even most professional perfume lines aren't even experts on this since the majority of the ones that carry a price tag that would pay my rent for a month all smell the same... I dare someone to tell me that I'm wrong. I'll take a cheap perfume or cologne that actually has an individual scent any day over one made by Britney Spears. Or if you don't believe me, listen to Foamy...

The Hobbit is on DVD!

It's here on DVD everyone! Grab your copies, curl up and enjoy the sound of Thorin Oakenshield singing "Misty Mountains Cold" in your own home!

Mayhem Lineup Revealed!!!!!

Oh... my... gods... you guys! This year is going to be nothing less than completely epic! The lineup has just been revealed! Feast your eyes my little gothlings and get pumped up for this summer!

We've got...

Rob-fucking-Zombie!

Five Finger Death Punch 

Amon Amarth and...

Children of Bodom!!!

There's plenty more awesomeness there, I'm just running out of space for all the videos! Get ready for some serious head-banging!

Foamy Chibisode!

P.S. I NEED A GERMAINE CHIBI PLUSHIE!!!!!!! LIKE NOW!!!!!!!

Calling All 90's Kids!

So I wandered on into Target today to go and pick up a couple groceries that me and my boyfriend had previously forgotten to get over the weekend. I'm wandering around with groceries in hand when I realize that Rise of the Guardians released on DVD. If you don't know how happy this makes me, go look here. While I'm over in the tech section looking at movies that I shouldn't buy, I happened to stumble across something that I never thought I would ever see again... 

And no, I'm not kidding. I saw the original Mighty Morphin Power Rangers series on DVD! Now, this is what all 90's kids grew up on. Everyone had their favorite Power Ranger (Trini was mine) and we all rooted in high-pitched, badly pronounced cheers for them when they faced off against those classic villains like Rita Repulsa. And dear gods did it suck! No, seriously, think about it. That was one of those shows that you can only love as a child. Between the horrible effects, the corny fight-sequences, and the over-dramatized dialogue, there wasn't too much that was right with this show... And we all loved the shit out of it. I remember waiting until my mom was out of the house then switching the channel over to Power Rangers. Yeah it was a pile of karate crap, but that was what I lived for! Admit it, even you get nostalgic when you think about the opening theme song. You know the one... 

Never mind that the Yellow Ranger played a sadistic bitch that takes a tattoo gun to a dude's eye and winds up being thrown out a fifth story window in Crow: City of Angels or that the Silver Ranger now looks like this...

If you were a kid during the 90's this was the bread and butter of your television viewing experience. And now you can relive the whole sorry thing on DVD... aren't you excited?!

Germaine Talks Bod Mods

And no, this isn't going where you think it's going. This is more about the body itself and not piercings and tats. A little disappointing, but it nonetheless brings up a good point.

And P.S. corsets are awesome, why the hate for corsets?

Disappointment and Euphoria

Well, I had planned on surprising my little gothlings with the new lineup for Rockstar Metal Mayhem, but they're dragging their asses a little more than last year and we won't know who will be included until March...   Watch the countdown timer with impatience and pain. I know I will be...

On a happier note, we now can all enjoy the second season of Game of Thrones in our own homes any time we want! Which is good since we still have another month to wait until the third season comes out and shit really starts hitting the fan. Yes, I know what happens because I've read way ahead. No, I'm not going to spoil anything/make it easy on you and tell you anything -insert evil laugh here- 

So cry and then rejoice! 

Foamy vs. Dubstep

This time, Foamy turns his laser sights on a popular music genre. I honestly can't think of why most of dubstep is so freaking popular... *listens to a random pop music song* Oh... right... most people don't give a  shit when everything sounds the same anymore... C'mon people! I was able to figure that out by time I was 13! My mom forced me to listen to some Christina Aguilera song or other when she was dropping me off at school one day. The song mercifully ended and when asked what I thought about it, my exact words were, "She has a good voice but she's wasting it on crap songs that have already been heard at least five times over..." Yes, I can stand some dubstep, like Skrillex or Lindsey Stirling's dubstep songs, but the majority of dubstep that I hear sounds exactly the same!

Laser Skrillex Show

Be jealous people! Be very jealous! Down at the Carnegie Science Center, only a stone's throw away from where I live, is featuring a series of laser shows in their massive planetarium. And one of the shows they feature is one with lasers... A LOT OF LASERS... to songs from Skrillex! And they feature two of my favorite songs!

AND...

This is beyond awesome! If you're near the Pittsburgh, go and check this out asap! You can find show times here at the site for the Carnegie Science Center. Enjoy!

Song of the Day: "Blood" by In This Moment

This was a song that took a little time to grow on me, but now its an essential in my music arsenal. Not to mention I love Maria Brink! Enjoy my darlings!

Book Review: Bad Glass

I've read my fair share of "horror" stories, and honestly most of them haven't exactly left me cowering under the sheets or giving me nightmares. Are they creepy? Well, yeah, they're kind of designed to be. But a book that leaves a lasting impression on the reader even once you've put it down for the night or placed it back on the shelf is something you don't come across very often. Don't get me wrong, I love H.P. Lovecraft, he's utterly amazing and can send shivers up your spine better than any other writer I know. Bad Glass, however, brings something entirely different to the table.

Written by Richard E. Gropp, Bad Glass takes you into modern day Spokane, Washington. A young and aspiring photographer named Dean hopes to make his big break by photographing the goings on in the city. But what he plans to photograph has been the talk of nightmares to the world outside this city. For months, Spokane has been quarantined by the military, all communications have been practically shut down, and the city is now a dangerous place. What exactly is happening here, no one is really certain, all they know is it is terrifying. Hundreds still linger within its borders, but they struggle every day. Within a day of sneaking past the military barricade, Dean finds his mind unraveling under the influence the city has over its inhabitants. People disappear without any warning, there are living people merged with the buildings, buildings appear in the mist then vanish within the hour, and strange animals wander the streets. Dean's misguided dreams soon leave him at the mercy of the strange happenings of Spokane while he and his new friends attempt to survive in a city determined to destroy them.

Sound apocalyptic enough for you? It gets even better. I can safely say that no other work of fiction I've ever read has left me feeling the way I did after finishing it. During one of the final acts of the book, something occurs to a character that made me feel physically sick even as I read it. Most chapters I read left me shaking and unhinged for a while once I put it back down and went back to work. When a friend of mine asked me what made it so terrifying, I couldn't even tell him what exactly it was, only that it would give Silent Hill a hell of a run for its money. Even Silent Hill couldn't give me nightmares, and I vividly remember a nightmare steeped in the monsters and twisted happenings of Bad Glass. Now that it's done, this is going to be one of the books that will stick with me for a long time and that I will continue to recommend to my fellow horror lovers. Do you dare to read it yourself? Take a look and see...

Zombies on the History Channel?

I found it kind of weird myself to find some of our favorite shambling monsters on none other than the History Channel a couple days ago. Let's face it, when we think of history, the only zombies we think of are the stereotypical old farts that might teach at Harvard until they're leaning on a cane... Either that or the students around finals time. Yet, zombies were front and center for a special called "Zombies: A Living History." And of course I couldn't pass up an opportunity like this, so I recorded it and watched it later.

The two hour special went over not just the likelihood of a zombie outbreak, the likely outcome if a zombie outbreak ever did occur, but also the history of zombies! Yeah, zombies have a history! How wild is that? Honestly, besides the old school stories about the Haitian zombies who were more like zoned out house-workers and the classic Night of the Living Dead by George A. Romero, I never even knew that zombies could be found in other cultures. For being undead, these creatures know how to get around. They make appearances in Scandinavia, Saudi Arabia, China, and even England. Honestly me favorites were the Draugr from Norse mythology and the Ghoul from Arabic culture.

What was even cooler, was that the guests on the show even went into the history of the precautions that people took to make sure the dead stayed dead and buried. And this might seem the weirdest part of the whole thing, but think about it, even today the coffins that we carefully select to place our loved ones six feet under lock from the outside, and there is no way to unlock it from the inside. A moment of perspective here: You're going to be placing a dead body under six feet of hard, compacted earth, enough to crush a steel coffin, and we still feel the need to lock the coffin from the outside... doesn't exactly make sense when you look at it too closely. And get this, in some of the oldest burial sites, archaeologists found stones (big ones) placed in the mouths of the dead. Not mention the tradition of binding mummified corpses in layers upon layers of linen in Ancient Egypt. All seems pretty weird, don't you think?

Anyway, if you see this thing, definitely check it out. It has a fun "How to Defend Against a Zombie" bit before each commercial break too!

Movie Review: Hotel Transylvania

In a time where most monster movies have become the disappointment of the century due to misguided attempts to rework their stories (*cough* Twilight *cough*), I honestly wasn't sure what to expect out of Hotel Transylvania. The premise was simple enough: Dracula (played by Adam Sandler... Yeah! Adam Sandler!) decides to create a castle-sized hotel for him, his daughter (Mavis), and all their classic monster friends to ensure their safety from the humans who have persecuted them since their creation. This idea, while brilliant, doesn't seem to stand up to the modern human when a stray backpacker finds the hotel on the eve of Mavis's 118th birthday. Desperate to keep the guests from knowing a human has managed to find his safe haven, Drac decides to dress up the wayward kid (Johnny) as Frankenstein's cousin when he refuses to leave. Things get even more complicated when Mavis and Johnny start falling for each other.

Yes, its a kids movie about all those classic horror movie monsters that hit the silver screen before most of us   were born. You've got Frankenstein, the Wolfman (played by Steve Buscemi by the way), the Invisible Man, the Mummy, and a slew of other characters including an insane cook named Quasimodo. But its actually one of the better "monster movies" I've seen within the past year. It's flat out adorable in some moments, they openly mention Slipknot, its rife with great techno music, and it even makes fun of Twilight! I'm not kidding! At one point Dracula sees Johnny watching a movie that is painfully recognizable as Stephanie Meyer's historic flop of a story, hears Edward say "Have you ever dreamed of being a Vampire?", then groans and rolls his eyes and says "This is what we've been reduced to?!" Not to mention baby Mavis is the cutest little thing ever...

My official opinion, watch this movie!

Germaine Hates Tailgaters

Oh boy, can I relate to this. I despise people who feel the need to ride my ass while I'm driving. Especially when I'm already going about ten miles over the speed limit! I've already gotten rear-ended twice from stupid people who don't know how to pay attention while driving. And here's the kicker, both times, I was at a dead stop! Yeah! Ugh... people...

I'm Back!!!!! (Finally)

Hello all my little gothic darlings! I've missed you all so much! Please forgive me for being gone so long, but I only just now got internet access in my new apartment this very day... Verizon decided to take their sweet damn time figuring out how to install Fios out here... Anyway...

I return to you with yet another Foamy Double Feature! First in line is a subject that has been much talked about. And not always with the most common sense present either... Violent video games! Dun dun duhhhhhh! Yeah, we're still hung up on that good old excuse it seems. Yes, young children are all "monkey see, monkey do" but I would hope that parents are not stupid enough to allow young and impressionable children play such things without explicitly telling them that the things contained in the video games are bad! Seriously, how hard is it to parent your child and either disapprove of a violent video game and not let them play it or teach them the difference between fiction and reality?

And this other one is just for fun.
Warning: If you have an intense fear of squids or octopuses, are easily offended by sexual themes, etc. then why the fuck are you watching Foamy in the first place?